I've been sad lately because you aren't here. I miss your face. I love your beard. And if you don't wanna cut your hair ever again, that's ok by me. Just keep it clean.
I think you smell fantastic. And, good heavens, you're hot. Those jeans, your butt...can't speak right now.
I was broken when you found me. Insecure, self loathing, and afraid. I didn't believe you'd ever want a girl like me. Fat, nerdy, loud...well you know what I'm like. Sometimes when I look at you, I panic because I'm afraid you'll see what a mess I am and want someone better than me.
Those first few conversations we had I felt so dumb. I talked about my kids a lot. And my job. I was always afraid that you'd think I was boring. But you stuck it out. You always asked about the things that were important to me. Sometimes while I was talking and laughing you'd just watch me as if I was the most interesting person in the world.
When I said we couldn't go on dates because I hated that word, you just said ok. Every time you asked me out, you'd say, "Wanna go jump roping?" It always made me laugh.
One day while we were eating, some friends stopped and asked if we were dating. You told them no you were just using me for sex. That was the moment I fell for you. I knew you totally understood me and my need for laughter.
I appreciate your patience. When I finally told you about my childhood and why I wouldn't let you meet my kids, you just smiled and said ok. Not one ounce of guilt. You didn't push. I love that about you.
It's been a long road. Meeting you helped me heal. You always make me feel beautiful and desired. But you taught me to believe that about me and not rely on you for those feelings. You've held me when I cried. And understood when I needed more reassurance than most.
I prayed for you. I longed for you. I said I'd never love again because I didn't believe in it. I've fought against you. I've fought with you.
We're getting married today. I'm terrified. Two minutes after you left this morning you texted me to tell me you couldn't wait to smack my ass after the minister says to kiss the bride. I can't wait either, you sexy beast.
So I don't know where you are tonight, just know that I love you. I'm waiting for you. And I'm impatient...so make this snappy.
